Feelin' Lucky?

Okay...so I know I haven't written in a while, but I am assuming that no one really reads this blog, and that the only reason I keep up with it, is because I have somewhere to put my thoughts "on paper" and there is the slight hope someone, somewhere is reading this and getting something out of it...

even if the something is only "this girl is not as funny as she thinks"

p.s. this post is about my man...so don't read on if you don't want to feel all mushy-gushy inside from the sweet things I write.

June and July have been extremely busy...not just for me but for my man! He has been gone for...lets count, about 5 weeks. I have been on one trip with him, so we will take the count to 4 weeks...but still that is a long time! Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that he is in love with his job, and cares so much about the youth and what they are doing and every time I see him with the youth or hear them talk about him...I know it is what God had planned for him all along....I still miss him like crazy when we are apart. 

He always says "a week isn't that long...you won't know I left" but what he doesn't realize is that I miss him all the time. NOW let me get something straight, I love my man but I love being apart from him too, and even though I miss him when we are apart, I know being apart is good, and yes I will admit, I like it sometimes too. It makes you remember why you miss him when he is gone, it makes you remember why you want to be with him the majority of the time...time apart is good.

that doesn't mean I always want time apart.

You are probably thinking...what is she talking about? this doesn't make sense...

I am a woman, we are complicated....deal

Even though I miss him so much sometimes I think I can really feel my heart hurting, I am so proud of the man he is, how dedicated he is to his job, and I remember how lucky I am to be with him.. And now that I have graduated (still not really believing that happened) I will be able to go on a lot more youth events with him...which he is just a bonus to going on youth events...the main thrill is the youth group. 

I love our youth group...especially the girls (no offense boys)

The girls are amazing, I have always seen it, but recently I have grown a lot closer to the majority of them and I love them so much!

here is why....

I was able to go Church Camp this year once again, it was my 15th year...and easily a top 5 favorite year in my book. I had a great cabin of 7th and 8th grade girls, with a great co-counselor, but the best part was getting to go to the late-night devos with the girls.

 I was reminded of how much a young girl goes through in high school and how tough it is being a christian, a teenager, and a girl. On the first night I went, some of the girls were talking about bad relationships they have been and I was compelled to tell them my past...

I spoke to the girls about my previous relationship not a lot of people know about. And I wont go in to details here, but I told them sometimes you are meant to go through crap, and bad spots in life to realize what you really deserve and need. 

I went through an awful relationship to realize that what I needed was a honest, silly, loving, sweet, crazy, fully devoted to God man. And I found him. (you may not know is that my man is the youth's youth minister)

 When I talked about him in the way I see him, they were all so happy that I shared and they said they knew he was great but not that he was so great to me. One girl said it made her so happy to know him and be around him, because it has helped her to see what kind of man she needs in her life...one just like him. 

Then the girls started telling me how much they appreciate me and my man's relationship and how we are a great example of a christian relationship...even now I am tearing up because it meant so much to hear that. Me and my man have not has the best "warm welcome" by some when we first started dating, and even were told by several people it was wrong for us to date...and hearing what the girls thought of our relationship made me feel so blessed to be there with them. 

I normally do not care what people think about me and his relationship, but hearing that the girls saw us a good example made my heart spill over with love for each of them. I try so hard to be a good example to all the young girls, because I know exactly what they are going through, and to hear that I am doing something right, made me so happy. and to know that what I am doing right is loving my man, made it even better. 

God works in mysterious ways, you have to go through the crap and hard times to find what he really has in store for you...God put those people in me and my man's life to make our relationship stronger and for us to know we depend on each other. God showed me the "ugly" side of those people in the beginning to know the beautiful side when I saw it (heard it). I am so incredibly blessed in a million ways to have my man in my life. and I thank God every day for him. He has brought me so much, including strengthening my relationship with God. He has taught me to love myself for who I am...clumsy, emotional, short, stubborn me. He has taught me it's ok to cry when you are upset, but then grow stronger. He has shown me to be confident in who we are as a couple and to always lean on him and most of all lean on God. 

God will get me through anything and everything

and I know that because of my man. 

He is a teacher, a youth minister, silly, sweet, weird, random, caring, and my best friend. 

And I am truly the luckiest to have in him my life. 

so look around and see what makes you...

feel lucky

 

I am happy :)

Ok I know most people don't want to read about how happy I am because that is not interesting and doesn't "grab" people's interests into my blog...but honestly I could care less because I am just so darn happy! (and yes I said darn...hanging out with kids all day will change your vocabulary).

So all this summer I am privileged to keep my two adorable nephews every day. Yes...they do have fights, yell, hit, pinch each other...and yes they yell at me, don't listen, throw things, wont eat what I tell them...but the bad only happens once in a while and the good happens more frequently. Like today we had three meltdowns before lunch, a time out for both boys but then after lunch we made slime! It was messy, green, sticky, and the boys loved it! After about 15 minutes they started to just mess it up even more so I said I would get the hose to clean off the porch...what they didn't know is that I planned to spray them too. :)

They loved it! They thought it was so funny that their Lala was breaking the rules and spraying them in their clothes! They laughed and ran around the yard for almost an hour! It was so funny to see how much joy they got out of a water hose and their Aunt spraying them in the face! 

This made the fights, pinches, yelling, and melt downs all worth it. Seeing how sweet and funny they were made me happy as well. After I dried them off, they were walking inside and they both hugged me and said thanks Lala...you're crazy. :)

Their joy of simply being sprayed with a water hose reminded me of how easy it is 

to find joy in anything you do.

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This next one might seem weird to be happy about but just stick with me: So my man is out of town this week, well not really out of town, he is just in Nashville but still he is not here and I won't see him until Friday night...but regardless I am happy. Why you ask? Because I know however much I miss him, he miss me too! And the fact that I miss him so much reminds me how much I love him. I also get to spend time with our cat Gus all by myself, one day I will be his favorite :) but anyways...although I am sad, and fell alone when I am not with my man, I know I will be fine, because I know he loves me just as much as I love him and I know he misses me to. He is the cheese to my macaroni, the PB to my J, the milk to my shake...the point is we go together and a little time away helps me to remember just how lucky I am and how much I love him. 

(Oh and also this past week was fabulous! I turned 22...and celebrated my year with my man. A great week with great people. I even got a snazzy new camera from my man)

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 I am very happy with everything that is going on right now. 

I love my life and feel very happy and blessed to be me!

              

                                                                    Psalm 118:24 - "This is the day the LORD  

has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."

What I'm Loving Wednesday....

First

I am loving that my birthday is in 5 days! woop woop! But what is weird I keep forgetting it is almost my birthday. Isn't that strange...but I guess it is because this birthday is not a milestone in my life. I am just turning 22, no big deal. No flags, parades, or sky writers please. I acutally would rather not do anything big, maybe just lunch or dinner with the most important people in my life. Maybe that is my wish...just for time. Time rushes by so fast that sometimes you forget to enjoy the little moments like fixing dinner with your brother-in-law, driving in the car with your nephews, watching food network with my little brother and sister, telling my mom about my day, going to Clarksville with my dad, talking in funny accents with my sister, and laying on the couch beside my man....time flies by so enjoy the little things.

 I know I do. 

Second

I am loving that I am back in my favorite town in the world. I love White House, and could not imagine being anywhere else (right now). This is where I grew up, went to school, my family is here, and this is where I fell in love. I love White House, and I love being home. 

Third

I love that next week I get to start a great job...watching two adorable, funny, and crazy boys...my nephews! I am so excited, it won't be like babysitting because I have to actually do "real stuff" with them not just lay around the house...but it will be great. I love them both so much and I am looking forward to spending all summer with my two favorite little redheads! Being a nanny will be awesome...just call me 

what are you loving?

What I'm Loving Wednesday....

So I really Like what people are doing with the "What I'm Loving Wednesday" so I think I will join them....

First I am LOVING that my man's mom is doing better. If you didn't know she had a heart-attack last Monday and was in pretty bad shape, but now she is doing a lot better. She is still on a breathing tube, but is responding to her family, she is awake, and they think she is making great progress. God is GOOD!

Second I am loving being completely done with school! It is extremely weird, but really great at the same time. I think it is weird because I have yet to do anything and am just being a bum at my parents house...but I am working on it. I am applying to any open jobs at any news station, and I have two part time jobs for the summer that will be great. It will all work out eventually...at least that is what everyone keeps telling me. 

Third I am loving this month! So much has already happened this month and still so much....I graduated, we had my graduation party (which was amazing), my parents gave me my early birthday present, tickets to see Young Frankenstein (and yes I took my man), my birthday is in less then 2 weeks, and in that same week it will be me and my man's one year! I can't believe how the time has flown by, sometimes I still think we just started dating. I am incredibly lucky and blessed to have him in my life, I waited my entire life to find him and I thank God everyday for sending me the man of my dreams. 

What are you loving??

oh my goodness....I hope I will be okay

well tomorrow is the big day...it is crazy!!! I am graduating from college...I don't know what to say, it seems like yesterday I was moving to Clarksville all by myself to take on college and now I am leaving with a degree and maybe a bit wiser? I can't believe it is happening...it has gone by so fast...but really it still hasn't hit me yet...I am not sure when it actually will, maybe when I am getting ready........actually I think it is hitting me right now! 

My stomach is tightening, my palms are sweating I.....am.....nervous! Not nervous about tomorrow so much, I am excited about that, but I think it is more of nervous of the unsure, nervous of the what comes next? What if I never find a job...what if I am going to be one of those college graduates who just work at Mcdonalds forever!?

Okay I know I am little fast to jump to that judgement, because number one I wouldn't apply to a job at Mcdonalds unless there was absolutely NOTHING else. But that kind of stuff happens all the time right? People cant find anything in this job market and end up just working where they can find any opening. I am all for making money and providing for yourself but I want to work somewhere I will love and preferably somewhere I went to school for. I know I will be fine financially but I want to work somewhere that I have dreamed about somewhere that will make me proud to say this is my job but then what if it never happens what if I Loren become a failure, a loser, a big, fat nobody....

I guess I am just scared nothing will happen but then I need to remember that no matter what happens (or doesn't happen) I still have people who love me: my family, my man, and most of all God! I know that no matter what comes my way or bypasses me I will be okay because God is holding my hand guiding me on the right path. I will be okay....I will be okay....I WILL be okay....I will BE okay....I will be OKAY...I WILL BE OKAY!

 (if I say it enough it will happen right?)

I don't think I can write anymore because I am not sure what exactly to say...because I am speechless, well not speechless just not sure how I am feeling right now. But trust me after tomorrow it will all spill out and believe it or not I will be fine, I will survive, I will move on, I will close this chapter of my life...

I will be okay! 

Proverbs 3:5: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding."

BLESSED

So the today I read this article today about "How to know he's the one." (I was passing time in the library) And some of the things on the list were really silly like "does he write you love songs every week?" or "does he lay his coat on the ground for you to walk on?" But then other things were sweet and true like "does he make you feel happy?"

Also am I the only who finds asking him to lay his coat over a puddle for you to walk on a bit much? Numero One: I wouldn't want my guy to put his coat on the ground for me to walk across it would ruin his coat, and why couldn't I just walk around the puddle, and if he was just really set on being so "charming" he could just pick me and carry me across the puddle (which unless it is 6ft wide, I can step over). Number two: what kind of girl asks a guy to lay his coat over a puddle for her to walk on? 

So anyways that article got me thinking, I know my guy is the one but what are some of the reasons I know he is the one? It also led me to think of how blessed I am to have him in my life, and how happy he makes me. So I thought I would make a list of all the reasons I know he is the one....

My List of How to know He's the One:

He makes you laugh

He makes you blush

He holds your hand

He knows just how to make you smile

He calls you sweet names and no one else

He hugs you tight

He makes you feel safe

He tells you sweet things out of the blue

He gets you little things he knows you will like

He goes to your family events and smiles through it

He opens the car door for you

He pays but then will let you pay too

He lets you watch your "girlie" TV shows and pretends to watch

He likes your family (or at least pretends to)

He brings you closer to God

He makes you want to be a better person

He makes you feel good about yourself

He can make your heart skip a beat

He can make you really mad

He can look at you and you forget why you were mad

He treats you as an equal

He asks your opinion 

He is his own person

He is silly 

He is sweet

He is nice

He calls you beautiful not hott

He remembers the little things (even though you forget them sometimes)

He texts you just to say hi

He finds things he knows you will like and shares them with you

He waits to watch a movie or a TV show until you are with him

So that is just some of the things on my list of how I know my guy is the one. They are definitely not the only reasons, but they are the ones I thought of when I read that article. Just looking over that list, I am reminded of how lucky I am to have such a great guy. I am blessed beyond reason with him and I know God put my guy in my life for a reason, and I also know he made us for each other. He is the one, my special person, my other half, the PB to my J, the chicken to my waffle, the Michael to my Dwight...with him I am truly the luckiest. 

What makes you lucky? What makes you blessed? Do you have a person that makes you feel perfect? 

Do you know how blessed you are? Know that the Lord is with you and he blesses you in every aspect of your life. He has blessed each and every one of us, you just have to remember that you are blessed because the Lord your God is with you. He puts people in your life for certain reasons, he guides you and keeps you safe. He leads you down a great path. So look around, what has God blessed you with?

Psalm 121:7-8
The LORD will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

What I'm Loving Wednesday....

So I have been reading all these different posts on Wednesday where people talk about what they are loving on this Wednesday...so I thought I would give it a shot....so here goes:

I am LOVING that I am 22 days from graduation, that is only 9 days of class, three days of exams (and then weekends and non-class days). I can barely contain myself, I am sooo soo sooo excited!

I am LOVING that my relationship with God is growing so much deeper then I ever thought possible. I had always wanted a deep relationship with Him, but I didn't know how to go about it, yes prayer and reading the Bible but something that I decided to do has helped my love for my Lord to grow to a new depth. And I love that! 

I am LOVING love....yes I know it sounds cheesy, and there should be harps in the background, and a naked baby floating above my head...shoot me (and to be ironic that is what the baby would do) I can't help it. I am not just in love with a person but with life right now and especially God. I am just feeling so much love for things I never thought I would. I had always thought about falling in love, but I never knew what it was like until recently. I am in love with all types of love in my life. 

I am LOVING my crazy friends in my women's studies class. That class is probably the most random, and awkward class I have ever been in but I love it, simply because of the girls in it. Yes some of the girls are Really weird...and I mean really REALLY weird...but then there are the few that I love! They are like me, and see the weirdness going on and laugh. Some girls take that class so seriously but come on, how serious can a class about being a woman (and talking about the woman parts) be?

I am LOVING the new show Extreme Couponing. It is crazy and scares me a lot. I never want to be one of those wives that has a giant stock pile of 28 jars of spaghetti, 30 sticks of D.O. and 90 bottles of shampoo. Now I am all for coupons but it is just ridiculous! Some of these people don't even have jobs they just coupon! It is crazy...maybe if I do want to save as much money as these people and start a stockpile I can hire someone to do it for me :)

Well I hope my first "What I am Loving Wednesday" told you a little about me and was all that it could be....

(that was a weird ending and I don't know why I rhymed)

Matthew 22: 37-39 "Jesus said, "You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' this is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself."